Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Almost Fucked Up

I met Martin while I was killing some time at SM North Edsa mall. He was actually not my type. He was dark-skinned, 5'8" and had a lot of facial hair. Yet I somehow found him sexy. Maybe it was his big chest, semi-toned arms and his pa-cool demeanor that caught my eye.

Like all hook-ups, ours started with eye contact. He followed me around the mall until we reached a 'safe' corner. He approached me and talked to me like I was really expecting him. He asked if I wanted to hang out. I politely declined. On one hand, I was holding a ticket to see 'Avatar' in 3D. I wasn't about to let a hook-up get in the way. He turned around, as if thinking of another great pick up line. Then he faced me again. His smile was infectious, sexy and very enticing. I know I'd fuck him in a heartbeat but the 3D ticket costs more than a quick fuck.

I ended up giving him my number. He promised to text me. I didn't expect him to.

Two months later, I was texting him from my bedroom. We've been sharing some silly quotes and some jokes. After sometime, this routine got boring so I decided we should meet again and finally fuck his brains out.

We first had dinner then watched a movie. We walked around the mall just talking about how we like it: top or bottom, slow or fast, how many rounds, etc. The sexual stimulation finally reached its peak that we decided it was time to visit the nearest Sogo hotel.

Then he dropped a bomb on me.

While approaching the hotel, he told me that he wishes the sex wasn't that unforgettable because he has to be away for two months. When I asked why, he explained that he is working as a seaman for a large shipping company.

It wasn't his job that bothered me. It was his possible lifestyle. Prior to meeting Martin, I read an article about the rise of HIV cases especially for seamen. I was worried and he noticed it. I explained my concern and jist laughed at me like it was a crazy idea. I apologized because I couldn't do it with him because I was scared and he wasn't assuring me that he was 100% clean.

He got pissed but also quite challenged. I could tell this guy was really interested in me. He told me that when he gets back after 3 months, he will take an HIV test with me and shove it up my ass - while he fucks me.

He was on a ship for three months but the texting and emailing never ceased. I got to know him more through his stories about his job and his family. He is working as an engineer at the engine room. He is the only son and he has four sisters. I also learned that he really likes me.

Excited about the idea of a relationship, I decided to wait until he comes back so we can finally talk in person about our situation. Soon after his contract expired, he came back to the Philippines and immediately arranged for us to meet. Great! We've been talking about having sex when he gets back. Finally, we'll get to do this.

But like a true gentleman, he remembered his promise to take an HIV test to assure me he is safe. So the day after he arrived, we went to a private clinic . They gave him some counselling before taking his blood. We sat at the waiting area for thirty minutes until the results were released.

Minutes before he was called by the doctor, he had a sexy smirk on his face. He pointed his finger at me then made a gesture as if he was fucking someone. He told me, 'This is you.' I asked him to stop.

Then a doctor called his name. He blew me a kiss before going inside. It was the longest 15 minutes of our lives. When he came out, he was shivering. His sweet smile has been wiped off his face by a piece of paper that indicates he is HIV positive.

That was the first time I didn't see a smile on Martin's face. He hugged me tight for a couple of minutes before excusing himself as he said he needed to go to the bathroom. I told him I will wait at the lobby.

That was the last time I saw Martin.

Monday, April 4, 2011


I've had only a few encounters with waiters. I don't exactly know if it's the pleasure of being served or just the slightest show of flirtation that excites me.

Some years ago, I had a huge crush on this waiter at Pizza Hut. He was very tall, very masculine, and his smile was to die for. He probably figured out that I liked him by the time I visited the restaurant for the 5th consecutive time and talked to no other waiter but him. But he was obviously straight. And I was still in the closet.

My first bold move happened in Malate. I was with a friend who knew almost everyone in all the gay establishments in the area - from waiters, to go-go boys, to owners and bouncers. Like a newly outed gay man, he introduced me to the cute waiters of O bar one by one. It was almost like an audition. He asked them to smile, kiss me on the cheek, shake my hand and go. I wasn't interested in anyone.. until I met Chris.

Chris was undeniably straight, and a new waiter I figured. He was very awkward and extremely nice, unaware of the watchful eyes of the gays waiting for him to hand them the drinks they ordered. I was one of them.

I gave him a tip. I tucked it in his pocket while 'accidentally' touching his crotch. The size intrigued me for a moment. He smiled. And walked away after giving me his number on a sheet of paper.

I texted him a couple of times and asked if we could hang out. He politely declined the offer saying he only works there...but doesn't entertain sidelines.


Perhaps the boldest attempt at getting a waiter was done by a former colleague. We were at a restaurant up north when he asked the waiter where we could find guys for hire. The man, who look liked he gets this question everyday, mentioned a couple of places before saying, 'or you can get me sir. Just let me know when.'


Saturday, March 19, 2011

Definitely back

Thanks to Blogger's new features, I was able to salvage what was left
of my old blog. I'm imported the posts onto this new blog. In case you
are one of those people who use to follow me, you can now revisit your
favorite posts.I have also reinstated my relationship with Twitter,
which is important when promoting this blog. I surely hope I can still
write more. 

Time has not been my friend lately but what would be the
point of reviving this blog?There are a lot of things I would like to
share. Things I could never share with anyone because... well, either
I'm too embarrassed to share them or it's true what a friend told me:
I left my other foot in the closet.

More to come soon. Like really

Monday, February 28, 2011

Back in action

I'm sad that I've lost my readers. My old url has been blocked so they probably do not know bout the new one. I haven't posted anything on here but I'll start posting old entries first.